It’s a personal one today folks, fasten your seatbelts because things might be about to get a bit bumpy up in here.
Disclaimer: While this post does cover issues that I feel bad about or overanalyse I’m not for a second saying that if you do these things too you are a bad feminist. A feminist is simply a person who believes in equality regardless of gender. Please read this post as the light-hearted confessional it was intended to be.
I feel better about myself when I wear make-up – Make-up and feminism have a strained relationship and its place within the movement differs depending on who you ask. My view is that women shouldn’t feel they have to wear it and men and non-binary people should be free to wear it without stigma. I love taking the time to apply make-up for a night out or, on some days, to feel like I’ve got my shit together at work, but those thoughts trouble me. The fact that I feel the need to don red lips to be taken seriously at a job interview or important meeting makes me wonder whether my feminism needs improvement. Also worth noting the fact that women are taken more seriously at a job interviews if they are wearing well-applied make-up… Feminism still has a long way to go.
I’m uncomfortable with my body hair – Eeeek, overshare, but here goes. Like every human I have body hair, and normally I choose to remove it, and those times when I choose not to I’m always so self-conscious about it I cover up as much as possible which kind of defeats the purpose of that choice. Rationally I know that it’s natural to have it, it’s not unattractive or attractive, it’s just a thing that exists but it’s so engrained in our society that women shouldn’t have it and I certainly feel like people will judge. I hear some of you say “let them” and I know you’re right but I’m just not quite there yet. I’m working on it.
Sometimes I wear clothes that make me look slimmer and I’m not sorry – Typing that made me squirm in my seat and actually I’m more than a little bit sorry. Ladies, gentleman and everyone in between, I’m a fraud… Only joking, I just like an easy life from time to time. I genuinely love my body and believe everyone should do the same. Sadly this world is full of people who buy in to certain beauty standards and sometimes it’s just easier to try to fit in. I have specific outfits that I pull out for family gatherings and catch ups with certain friends. I truly believe that “flattering” is bullshit and I try so so hard to live that life but people suck, society sucks and just occasionally my half-assed feminism sucks.
I’m rubbish at pronouns – Recently I met a beautiful non-binary person (whom I’m crushing on like crazy) and I asked them what their preferred pronouns are (they/them) but I’m so guilty of accidentally using gendered pronouns. I’m working sooooo hard on this and I know I’ll get it in to my head but every time I slip up I’m so annoyed with myself.
I think that’s enough confessions for one day. Do you do anything that makes you doubt your feminism? Leave a comments below.